Sex and Control: Beating Domination Myths

If you say to someone “dominatrix” they imagine a woman in leather with a riding crop surrounded by cages and torture devices, ready to relieve the sexual tension with some good hard sex. That isn’t the case, and here at Escort-Wales we take a look at the myths surrounding domination.

Types of domination

For a newcomer to the scene, receiving a light spanking with a paddle before sex might be considered domination, but there are so many different types of domination that saying pain is the only one just isn’t true. Domination can involve pain or domination of the mind or even money, meaning it can be used in many different ways.

Modern slaveryOf course the most common domination that you will see or hear about is inflicting pain or humiliation, as people long to give up control and simply follow instructions and demands given to them by someone else.

Wearing leather

I rarely wear leather, unless it is at the request of the client.

Being a dominatrix does not mean standing there in a sexy leather cat suit with a leather whip in your hand while you tell them to lie down and not move while you pleasure them.

It revolves more around your behaviour, meaning that being assertive and in control are more important.

As a rule, I try to make sure the outfit I wear is perfect, with no creases and everything looking immaculately clean so that my client feels even more on edge by the dominatrix he sees before him, no matter what I am wearing.

Hard sex

Hard sex can be fun, but rarely will I do this with a client. To me, domination is about giving up control, and sex is one of the things that you lose. You give yourself to your mistress, so she chooses what to do with you (within reason). Things like erotic massage and sex positions just don’t come into it.

What do you think? Is domination all about pain? Visit our forums and discuss it.

Martin Ward
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Martin Ward

Martin Ward is a well respected editor and writer with over five years experience in the adult industry. After stints in the Escort Advertising call centre and on the escort forum, he moved into the site editor position around three years ago.

Since then, he has specialised in articles on the battle for equal rights for sex workers, sexual health, as well as bringing the readers fun news from around the world. He also has a major interest in LGBT rights, and is an active campaigner in this field.

When he isn't fighting the good fight, he enjoys spending time with his girlfriend, and young daughter. He also enjoys reading and taking long walks.
Martin Ward
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